One Small Favour

One Small Favour is a humorous quest in which you are asked to complete a favour, although things turn out to be less simple than that.

Karamja
''Items required: A good pickaxe to mine the gems, a chisel, and some form of teleportation to Port Sarim, such as an amulet of glory to Draynor Village and walking there (or glory to Karamja), a Rimmington tablet/house teleport, Pest Control minigame teleport, or some coins to ride a ship there. There is also the fairy ring code, which teleports you close to the wall of Shilo Village by the gem rocks.''
 * Travel to Shilo Village, and talk to Yanni Salika in the antiques shop north of the river. He will ask a small favour—get some red mahogany logs from a forester south of the village.
 * Tip: After you've spoken to Yanni, it would be great to mine the gems before you depart Shilo. It would be wise to bring a chisel with you as there is a high chance to crush the gems.
 * Go outside the village to the south, and talk to a forester there. You are asked to take a blunt axe to Captain Shanks and get it sharpened.
 * (Optional) Go due west to the ocean, and there will be a ladder. Go up the ladder, and talk to Captain Shanks. He will tell you to go to Port Sarim and get the axe sharpened there. Buy a ticket from him (45 coins) or teleport to Port Sarim any way you can.

Asgarnia and Misthalin
Items required: A Lumbridge teleport (optional), Falador teleport (optional), a Varrock teleport, 3 steel bars, a harralander, 2 guams, a marrentill, a bowl of hot water (Farmer Fred has a water source; Farmer Seth has a range to boil), an empty cup (drink a cup of tea), 5 pigeon cages and a Camelot teleport, a lockpick is recommended for those with a low Thieving level.
 * Speak to Brian in the axe shop in Port Sarim. He is too worried about his friend, who is being convicted of a crime and deciding to go to the Wilderness to avoid trial, to sharpen your axe. Agree to help him by saying, "Ok, ok, I'll do it! I'll go and see Aggie." Brian will keep the axe for safekeeping, so make sure you give him the axe or you will be unable to proceed further.
 * Speak to Aggie the witch in Draynor Village about being a witness. She will help you if you agree to find her apprentice, Jimmy the Chisel, who has gone missing looking for supplies.
 * Go to the H.A.M. Hideout (east of Draynor Village). Go to the south-east corner, and speak to Johanhus Ulsbrecht regarding Jimmy, and ask, "And I suppose you need me to do you a favour?" He will let Jimmy go if you provide his cult with a month's supply of chickens; he suggests talking to Fred the Farmer.
 * Exit the H.A.M. headquarters, and go north-east to Fred the Farmer's house (the house with a bucket and a water drop on the minimap). Talk to Fred the Farmer, who does not have enough chickens. He tells you to go to Seth Groats (located east on the other side of the river in the chicken coop across from the cow field).
 * Tip: Before visiting Seth, drop by the cook's kitchen from Cook's Assistant, grab a bowl of water, and heat it on the stove. Get a pot too!
 * Talk with Seth Groats. He wants you to give three steel bars to Horvik in Varrock to make some cages for the chickens.
 * Speak with Horvik located in the armour shop north-east of Varrock Square. He is very ill and needs a herbal antidote and some pigeon cages to modify into chicken cages. (Take a cup of tea from the tea stall south-east of Horvik and Varrock East Bank, or wait until the druid part later.) Pigeon cages can be found in the garden behind Jerico's house, immediately south of the northern bank in East Ardougne. He says that you will need five of them.
 * Go to the Apothecary in Varrock regarding Horvik's illness. He gives you the herbal tincture but drops the breathing salts. Agree to get a new airtight pot.
 * Go to the Barbarian Village, and talk to Tassie Slipcast the potter. She is too worried to show you how to make an airtight pot because she is being pressured by a dwarf called Hammerspike Stoutbeard in the Dwarven Mines.
 * Go to the Dwarven Mines. Head to the westernmost cave past the anvils until you see Hammerspike Stoutbeard surrounded by dwarf gang members. Ask him about Tassie Slipcast, and tell him, "Oh, come on...do something nice for Tassie." Then, ask him, "Have you always been a gangster?" He will tell you that he always wanted to be a druid.
 * Go to Taverley, and talk with Sanfew, who is on the of the central house with the herb icon. Ask him if he's taking any new initiates and accepts dwarves, and tell him that a dwarf you know wants to become one. He will allow Hammerspike to become a druid apprentice, but he wants you to give a Guthix rest tea to Captain Bleemadge on top of White Wolf Mountain and organise a trip for Sanfew down to the Feldip Hills.
 * Use the bowl of hot water with an empty teacup (one spawns in the building north of Sanfew), add one harralander, two guam leaves and a marrentill. Once you have the tea, travel to the top of White Wolf Mountain. Speak to Captain Bleemadge, and give him the tea. He will want some T.R.A.S.H. (Triple Redundant Aero Super Hawsers) for the trip down to the Feldip Hills.
 * Note: Low levels should be aware of white wolves while travelling on the mountain.

Kandarin
Items required: Coins, a Camelot teleport, an Ardougne teleport, a ring of dueling, a chisel and some extra jades, opals and red topazes, and sapphires.
 * Travel to the general store south of Catherby bank, and speak to Arhein, who will ask for a weather report.
 * Go to the house with the water droplet north of the church in Seers' Village, and speak to Phantuwti Fanstuwi Farsight, who is looking for a missing person and cannot do the weather forecast until she is found.
 * Enter the cave south-east of the Fishing Guild entrance. Head north along the east wall until you come to a cave where Petra is trapped in rock. Right-click and search the sculpture to find a message saying to speak to Wizard Cromperty.
 * Go to the north-east corner of Ardougne and speak to Wizard Cromperty about a girl stuck in some rock. He needs some iron oxide from a man in Port Khazard.
 * Note: If you have yet to get the five pigeon cages, go to the house directly south of the northern bank in East Ardougne.
 * Go to Port Khazard. A quick way to get to there is to use the Minigame Group Finder Fishing Trawler teleport. Alternatively, take the boat from South Ardougne to Brimhaven and then the charter boat to Port Khazard for 400 coins. Talk to Tindel Marchant on the southern dock, and he will want his stodgy mattress stuffed for the iron oxide.
 * Go to the Feldip Hills (Fairy ring code, Feldip hills teleport or Ring of dueling to Castle Wars, or if you have 99 Hunter, you can teleport to the red chinchompas.), and talk to Rantz, who is located at the quest icon in eastern Feldip Hills. He cannot do it because there is a "small man" causing a disturbance which is scaring the chompy birds. Tell him that you'll see what you can do.
 * Go west until you see a landing strip with a gnome. Talk to him, and he will tell you he needs to repair the landing strip. Search each of the eight landing lights for a gem, cut it, and put it back in the landing lights. The gnome can sell you a chisel and spare gems for 500 coins each if you happen to crush them. Do not allow the gems to despawn, as you will have to bank to retrieve new ones.
 * Note: Bringing extra jade, opal, and red topaz gems with you avoids the cost.

Completing the favours
Items required: A comfy mattress, iron oxide, an Ardougne teleport, an animate rock scroll, a good pickaxe/weapon, armour and some food, a Camelot teleport, a hammer, a bronze bar, an iron bar, a steel bar, the weather report, a Falador teleport, a pot, soft clay, an airtight pot, a Varrock teleport, breathing salts, the herbal tincture, 5 pigeon cages, a Lumbridge teleport, chicken cages, some means of transportation or teleportation to get back to Port Sarim and Shilo Village, a sharpened axe and red mahogany logs.
 * Talk with Gnormadium to tell him the runway lights are fixed.
 * Go back to Rantz to get the comfy mattress.
 * Speak to Tindel in Port Khazard to get the iron oxide.
 * Take the iron oxide to Wizard Cromperty in Ardougne, and he will give you an animate rock scroll.
 * Next, you will need to fight a level 92 rock monster that is weak to crush attacks and uses Melee, so stop by the bank, get some food, and equip some decent armour and a weapon or pickaxe. Fighting with a pickaxe is recommended; however, low levels should use Magic from the safe spot shown above. It is also possible to fight the monster head on with just 1-2 prayer potion(s) and a pickaxe if you have at least 43 Prayer to use Protect from Melee.
 * Head back to the Goblin Cave near the Fishing Guild, and hug the eastern wall until you come to the same room as before. Stand in front of the sculpture and use the animate rock scroll and kill the Slagilith. After killing him, stand back in front of the sculpture and read the scroll once more.
 * The Slagilith has a maximum hit of 26, is hard to damage, and if you leave the room or take too long killing it, you will have to start the fight over. Travel back to the Goblin Cave south of Fishing Guild and cast the animation spell to begin the fight once again after defeating the Slagilith. Cast the spell in front of the rocks once again to release Petra.
 * Note: A bug currently exists that allows you to kill the Slagilith using Ranged attacks with full damage by equipping the pickaxe you brought before the hitsplat appears. Using this, the fight takes significantly less time when using Magic or Ranged combat.
 * Note: If it says, "You don't feel that you should cast this with enemies around", walk out of the room, and kill the bats around the entrance; then, return to the middle of the room and try again.
 * Go to Seer's Village, and speak to Phantuwti. He now can't give you the weather report because his weather vane is broken. You'll have to threaten to run him through, and ask him, "Why can't you get a clear picture?" Then, ask, "Which special Seers tools do you need?" and "What do you mean?" Finally, he'll tell you about his weather vane. Climb the ladder, head east, and climb another ladder to the roof of his house (36 Agility required). Search the weather vane, use a hammer with the weather vane, and search it again to get three broken vane parts. Go to an anvil (closest is across the street) with a bronze, iron, and steel bar, and use the parts of the weather vane with the anvil (30 Smithing required). Go back to the roof of the house, and put the weathervane pillar, the directionals, and the ornament back on the weathervane. Talk to Phantuwti again for a weather report.
 * Take the report to Arhein in Catherby, who will send somebody to send T.R.A.S.H. to Captain Bleemadge.
 * Talk to Captain Bleemadge on top of White Wolf Mountain.
 * Talk to Sanfew in Taverley, and he will agree to let the dwarf become an initiate.
 * Talk to Hammerspike in the Dwarven Mine. He has changed his mind about becoming a druid, and his dwarven gang members will attack you. Defeat them to have Hammerspike agree to not harass Tassie.
 * Go to Barbarian Village, and talk to Tassie, who will teach you how to make pot lids. Use the soft clay given to you on the wheel and then the unfired pot lid on the pottery oven.
 * Go to the Apothecary in Varrock, and give him the pot in return for the salts.
 * Go to Horvik, and give him the breathing salts, herbal tincture, and pigeon cages.
 * Go to Seth (his farm is on the east side of the River Lum), and give him the chicken cages.
 * Go to the H.A.M. headquarters, and tell Johanhus that you've managed to swing that chicken deal; he will agree to set Jimmy free.
 * Go to Draynor Village, and talk with Aggie the witch, who will agree to help Brian.
 * Go to Port Sarim, and tell Brian to get the sharpened axe.
 * Go back to the forester outside Shilo Village, and you receive some red mahogany logs in exchange for the sharpened axe.
 * Speak with Yanni in Shilo Village to complete the quest.

Reward

 * Quest points
 * Two experience lamps giving 10,000 experience to any skill of your choice. Skill must be at least level 30.
 * A steel key ring
 * The ability to make Guthix rest tea
 * The ability to craft pot lids
 * Access to the gnome glider route to the Feldip Hills

Trivia

 * Hammerspike Stoutbeard's desire to be a druid may stem from Pikel Bouldershoulder, a dwarf druid from several of R.A. Salvatore's books.

Required for completing
Completion of One Small Favour is required for the following:
 * King's Ransom
 * Swan Song